another goodbye

sigh. It’s only March and it is safe to say that I am completely and totally over 2011. I have said goodbye to a good friend. I have said goodbye to my best pug friend. And yesterday we said goodbye to poor little Walter, our gopher tortoise that we have been working so hard at getting healthy. You can read Walter’s story HERE.

I know it probably seems silly to most people, but losing Walter makes me very sad. I have grown quite attached to him, and we have put so much effort into helping this little guy feel better. He was faced with some tough odds right from the start, which made me want to do my best to give him a happy little life.

A few months ago we brought him to a vet when we realized his shell had gone very soft, very quickly. Hubby prepped me for what he thought was inevitable. Surprisingly, the vet was optomistic. The softness of his shell was a major concern, but he was hopeful when he heard how well Walter was eating and drinking. He got a super shot of antibiotics and vitamins, I was given a quick tutorial on how to give a tortoise injections, and we were sent home with numerous pre-filled needles of antibiotics and vitamins. I usually work my denial talents at this point, but instead I was realistic and worried often that he wasn’t going to make it.

But he turned around. Just a few days ago I was reflecting on how well he has been doing. I was sure his shell was getting stronger. He was eating great. And then, he died. I don’t understand what happened. We know that he has been struggling with a respiratory infection since the day we got him, and I am sure that is what finally took him. But he was doing so good.

I hate goodbyes. I am not good at them.

I am tired of saying goodbye.

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